Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30 NKJV)

We’ve all been there. The dreadful and the unavoidable: the comfort zone! It’s so easy to keep visiting the zone rather than seeking true comfort where we all know where to find it. The truth is, this “comfort” zone isn’t what it promises, it’s not comfortable! We may escape the reality and the stress that life may bring from time to time by doing activities that are considered “stress free,” but our minds will not find it restful, but restless. There’s this song appropriately called “Restless” by my favorite band Switchfoot and the lyrics truly resonate someone falling out of the comfort zone. For a time, this someone was me.

• The Marriage Zone

I was that “sea on a moonless night” and I was also that “raindrop falling down always longing for the deeper ground.” Although I didn’t want to admit it, I was comfortably restless. After marrying the love of my life, I thought it would solve all of my life problems and I would live happily ever after. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happily married, but marriage will NOT satisfy anyone to the fullest. Hollywood will never tell you this: there will be days that the protagonist in our love story can become the antagonist. It’s scary to live with someone who knows every habit, strength, weakness, secret, (and you name it), of mine. They always tell us the most difficult year is the first year of marriage, but then comes the second year and we start feeling, well, comfortable. As I read a book on how to be a successful wife, I started believing a lie. In God’s eyes, I’ve failed Him and I failed Kenny. I was not the typical housewife I thought God wanted me to be.

• The Career Zone

I’m also just a lowly server at a restaurant and there were times, to be brutally sincere, I hated it! From my point of view, people were demanding, needy, and annoying… especially, when they were trying to be nice! In reality, the problem wasn’t them, it was me. When I was 18, I had a different picture of what I would be doing in my mid-20’s, and serving tables wasn’t one of them. “What are you studying?,” “where do you go to school?,” and “what do you want to do after you graduate?” are very common questions asked by many diners. Although I love being told how young I look, these questions took me to a very dark and lonely place. One night, I was serving an older gentleman and he asked one of those dreaded questions. I laughed and thanked him for making me feel younger than I actually am, but he kept insisting to tell him what I do aside from serving tables. I replied, “well, I am a wife and I look after the best interests of my husband.” His answer stung my pride as he replied: “yes, but what do you do? you must do something aside from being just a waitress?” Like the song, I felt like I was “running hard for the other side, the world I’ve always been denied.” Every 15th of the month, I am also reminded through a school loan payment that I’m a college graduate without a career. I resented this. I resented anyone who reminded me of this.

• The Friend Zone

He who walks with wise men will be wise,
But the companion of fools will be destroyed. (Proverbs 13:20 NKJV)

Then I started examining my friendships. I had lost a lot of friends due to miscommunication, lack of communication, and too much communication (gossip). I was being exhorted by my mentor and my husband to choose wise friends, people whose conversations I had would edify me, not bring me down. I was told to seek the company of older and wiser women, so I did. For awhile, I was seeking friends who would understand me and would feed my self-pity by reminding me that the problem wasn’t me, but it was “them.” Friends who wouldn’t like the people I didn’t like and friends who expected me not to like the people they didn’t like. This was emotionally draining to keep up so I finally stopped the habit, and since then I’ve attempted to separate myself from unnecessary drama.

• The Enemy Zone

For it is not an enemy who reproaches me;
Then I could bear it.
Nor is it one who hates me who has exalted himself against me;
Then I could hide from him.
But it was you, a man my equal,
My companion and my acquaintance.
We took sweet counsel together, and walked to the house of God in the throng. (Psalm 55:12-14 NKJV)

I came upon one realization: I just wanted to be loved by everyone. I mean, who doesn’t want that? Deep down, we all care what people think about us, and some people care a bit too much; but overall, it is safe to say we all want to be loved. We will also go above and beyond to make that happen too. Others will do the extravagant to achieve it, but again, that only means that we care. If only we cared as much about how He thinks of us? Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with caring; but once our emotions dictate our actions, then that’s when the problem arises. When we are so insecure of ourselves, we change for others rather than change for Him and for the better. When we care so much as to change behaviors, we suffer from having multiple personalities. To one person we are “this,” to the other we are “that.” For example, my favorite color is red, but if I tell Kenny it is blue because I know that’s his and I tell my mom it’s green because that’s hers, and so on, then no one will ever know my favorite color. Then I tell Kenny how horrible green is and to never wear anything with green and I go tell my mom how blue is an ugly color and she better not buy me anything with blue in it. I’m only discussing colors here, but what if we replace colors with something deeper and more personal such as our faith?

As of right now, God has been taking me out of my comfort zone by teaching me to love those who don’t love me back while remaining genuine about it. The very simplistic “love your enemies” has been the most complicated application as of yet. How can we love and serve people who want to see us fail and who maliciously think and talk about us behind our back? To actually see the good in every person, even when there’s a personal and spiritual attack going on? To remain with a thankful and prayerful heart as to guard my heart from any bitterness and anger creeping in? To truly practice and apply this verse:

But I say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you. (Luke 6:27-28 NKJV)

• The “Meow” Zone

For our boasting is this: the testimony of our conscience that we conducted ourselves in the world in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom but by the grace of God, and more abundantly toward you. (2 Corinthians 1:12 NKJV)

Then there’s our oldest cat, a silver tabby, Jack Bauer (named after 24). Jack loves to rest, I mean, that’s all he does. We always find him on our bed pampering himself to kitty naps! He is also the most loving, most kind, most caring cat you will ever meet. When I get home, he waits for me on top of the staircase and expects me to lay down and cuddle with him. When he sees me cry, he comes to the rescue and he sits on my lap attempting to comfort me. I know they say “dog is a man’s best friend,” but that’s because they haven’t met Jack Bauer.

Now Chuck Norris, our orange and white tabby, is the opposite of Jack. Chuck is very independent, though we believe he uses Jack to get us to feed him. Chuck doesn’t want anything to do with us. As soon as we extend our hand to pet him, he runs away as if we were trying to hurt him. He’s truly a teaser! He gets close enough to us, but then he leaves us with our hand hanging. But our hands are not left hanging too long because Jack loves a good petting session anyway. Chuck’s loss is Jack’s gain.

These two cats have taught me so much about our relationship with God. Jack is like that Christian who is constantly seeking and resting in His Savior’s arms. Always on his master’s side, Jack loves me even when I discipline him! When Kenny plays rough with him, Jack responds very passively; sometimes giving Kenny a small scratch while reminding him that cats have claws and could do serious damage if he really wanted to! Ask Chuck Norris about serious damage because he likes to play rough and disobey every time! The real problem with him is how fearful he is of us. A few incidents where we had to take him to the vet was enough for Chuck not to like us. Don’t we do that with God? We don’t like God because when He tries to restore us and change us, we resist and we distance ourselves from Him. The more we resist, the more it will hurt us! Every time Chuck runs away from us, his clumsy self collides with the wall, the door, or the coffee table.

I know Jack’s only a cat, but his simplicity and sincerity have convicted me. I was once given 2 Corinthians 1:12 and was told that I was a simple girl, but I needed to work on my godly sincerity. It never occurred to me how many relationships I’ve damaged because I simply couldn’t be honest.

• Comfort Food

Comfort zone doesn’t hold a bad connotation when it comes to food! About two weeks ago, Kenny’s parents invited us to Shelby’s Kitchen and Deli, a diner that’s been featured on The Food Network. We weren’t expecting much, but the place was immaculately clean and the workers were friendly. The food was just comfort food, but it delivered. Kenny had the burger and I had the half chicken. Both of these items were shown on TV so we figured we’d give it a shot! Next time, we will be visiting for breakfast and maybe we’ll try their 24 inch pancake!

Food: 3/5

Service: 3.5/5

Decor/Ambiance: 3.5/5